new jersey delli

HOME FOR THE HOLiDAYS

The clock on the cable box says 3:22am. Bernie and Bianca are fast asleep. I'm up wrapping stuff, watching pre-Iron Man Robert Downey Jr. do what he used to do best, carve turkey and horse ride Dylan McDermott who, not surprisingly, is bland; wondering how Steve Guttenberg had morphed from the sexy cut-off denim shorts-wearing Mahoney to the present-day caricature of himself; and realizing why or this is why I'm not home for the holidays.

sent from the G1.

HAIR RAISING

In-flight entertainment on the trip back to the Northeast, 11/23/07.

HAIRSPRAY:  Thin men. Fat women. Fattened John Travolta. Still fat Queen Latifah.

A mess-merizing mesh of wiggly/jiggly dance moves, of big boobs and bad hairdos. 

On the scale of 1 to 5 Zs, five being the worst, this film is an (im)perfect 10.  A snorer.

BOURNE TO PLEASE

After an almost six-hour brief on the Bourne files Saturday, I finally went to see The Bourne Ultimatum on Sunday.

The third installment of the action thriller based on the Robert Ludlum's bestseller picks up where it left off in The Bourne Supremacy.  In his quest for the truth, Bourne goes on a James Bond-ish whirlwind tour of exotic cities of the world.  Unlike the Licensed-to-kill however, the ex-assassin is bereft of pomp, hump, pump and romp in a tight blue swimsuit.  Still, Bourne delivers the punch(lines).

Joan Allen as the ballsy Pamela Landy kicked ass. Matt Damon on the other hand, with another 70 million dollars credited to his name this weekend alone, didn't disappoint.